Sad vs Bitter

I've been trying to decide if I feel sad or bitter today.

The whole "Ex is coming with us to the lake so, uh, you can't" situation leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, that's for sure. But at the same time, I knew this sort of thing might happen. It was a guarantee. So maybe what I feel is just a bit of sadness that I won't be seeing some pals this weekend, relaxing in a cabin, or making use of my two o'clock departure time.

Well, I made some use of it. I went to Target and B&N and now I'm sitting here blogging.

Then there's San Diego Guy.

San Diego Guy is a fella I went out with a couple of times last year...well, early this year, I guess - he lives near my parents. I can't say we went on dates, but we would grab coffee and there was talk of visiting the Star of India at some point.

Then I got laid off.

And his interest evaporated.

Now, mind you, when I told the fellow of my unfortunate lack of employment, I wasn't looking for a pity party. I was receiving unemployment and doing some freelance work. Things were tighter than I wanted them to be, but I was certainly capable of continuing our coffee meetings.

Except he said, and this is a direct quote, "I don't think I can date someone who might be a mooch."

A mooch?

Me?

Okay, whatever, dude's a jerk, I'm cool.

Fast forward. I have a job. I am chilling like a villain in OC. I guess my mother spoke to his mother or something (it's a gated community...everyone talks to everyone else...our neighbor down the street, who I don't know by name, congratulated me last time she saw me) and I get a text from him saying "Hey! Let's hang out!"

My expression: O___o

Initial reaction: Delete! Don't talk to the chump!
Second reaction: Well, if I'm going to be down there this weekend anyway...

I'm trying to gauge my level of interest - if I'm just bummed about my friends by the lake and think he'll make up for it, if I'm a glutton for punishment, or if I'm curious. Maybe it's something of all three.

Anyway. My original point - to me, sad usually is just that - sad. Bitter always has kind of a vindictive edge...like "I'm sad....and I hope someone gets bitten by a jellyfish."

I am not at that point.

Bummed it is.

While rummaging around at B&N I came across Sense and Sensibility & Sea Monsters, which I assume is a companion to Pride and Prejudice & Zombies, which...is sitting on my shelf unread. I'm wondering what's next. Oliver and the Occult? David Copperfield and Demons?

Actually, not gonna lie: I'd read that.